From Surviving to Thriving After 50: Interview with author, Debbie Weiss

From teenage caregiver to bestselling author and successful entrepreneur, Debbie Weiss proves that it's never too late to rewrite your story. In this powerful episode, Debbie shares how she transformed from someone who constantly said "I can't" to living a life full of "Maybe I can." Through personal challenges including weight struggles, caregiving responsibilities, infertility, and widowhood, she discovered that resilience isn't just about surviving—it's about thriving.

Learn how Debbie's journey from hiding in the shadows to becoming an international speaker and author of "On Second Thought, Maybe I Can" parallels the core principles of preparedness: building resilience, adapting to change, and creating a strong foundation for whatever life brings. She shares practical wisdom on overcoming fears, developing mental toughness, and finding your voice even in life's most challenging moments.

Whether you're facing your own personal challenges or working to become more self-reliant, Debbie's story reminds us that our greatest limitations often exist only in our minds. Discover how small, consistent actions—what she calls "sprinkles"—can lead to transformative change and help you create the life you truly want to live.

This episode isn't just about surviving life's curveballs—it's about learning to thrive despite them. Join us for an honest, heartfelt conversation about turning "I can't" into "Maybe I can," and finding freedom through personal growth and resilience.

Join us at Preparedness Pro in our Facebook Group or on our blog where you'll find peaceful, practical preparedness advice every day of the week!

Transcript

From Surviving to Thriving:Debbie’s Journey to Self-Reliance and Living Her Best Life 
Kellene: [00:00:00] Welcome to Preparedness Pro, where being prepared isn't about fear. It's about freedom. I'm your host, Kellene, and every episode we explore the peaceful principles of preparedness and self reliance. No gloom, no doom, just practical solutions for everyday living that help you become more independent and prepared for whatever life brings your way.
From kitchen skills to financial wisdom, emergency planning to sustainable living. We're building a community of capable, confident people who understand that preparedness isn't about preparing for the worst. It's about being free to live your best life regardless of what comes your way. So whether you're starting your preparedness journey or you're a seasoned pro, you're in the right place.
Welcome.
Good morning, everyone. It's Kellene, the preparedness pro. I have a great guest for you today. This is going to be life changing for some of you. I know that I've enjoyed what I've gotten to know about her and her life. I have Debbie Weiss. Who is a [00:01:00] bestselling author. She is the author of a memoir called On Second Thought, Maybe I Can
I just love that title. She's also the coauthor and an Amazon bestseller. It's a collaborative book called Heart Whispers. Debbie's also an entrepreneur running both an insurance agency. She runs a state farm insurance agency and her online store called a sprinkle of hearts. She also hosts the maybe I can podcast.
has led her to become an inspirational speaker. She was a long time family camp caregiver. And of course she's a mother as well. Some of you are going to be able to relate to some of her challenges. And I hope more importantly, you'll be able to relate to how she overcame them and her view on life now.
You'll see Debbie and all her pink array in the background. She's even got, we can't see it right now the way I've got the shot, but she's even got a pink rotary phone, which I just love in the background. Debbie, welcome to the show. 
Debbie: Oh, thank you [00:02:00] so much for having me. I'm really excited to be here.
Kellene: Well, I'm excited to have you. We have some similarities. I've struggled with weight quite a bit. I'm, I was down a hundred pounds. I'm back on the up. Thanks to struggling with infertility and the drugs that they put me on that really whack things out. So you can relate to that. Fortunately I've never had to be a long term caregiver.
I think that would be very trying. I was a home health caregiver for a little while. It was one of the jobs that I had in my twenties. But that was in my twenties. I was a little bit more agile and able and that was my job. It wasn't a family member that I, got hooked up with and had to take care of.
So why don't you share with us you've tackled some of life's most intent curve balls with weight struggles. Caregiving at 17. I mean, there's so many other things that a 17 year old wants to do infertility and then even becoming a widow. But here you are shining like a disco ball on a Saturday night.
What sparked your [00:03:00] mindset shift? How did you get from feeling like a victim and just having to react to life to actually chasing your dreams? 
Debbie: I think. It happened when I was in my fifties, because there was something about being in my fifties or turning 50 that made me step back and take a look at my life and say, I am on a trajectory to quickly be at the end of my life.
Cause the first 50 years went quickly, even though it didn't feel like it when you're in the moment. Right. And I thought, I don't want to be that person at the end of my life who looks back with regret of things that I haven't done. Or experienced. And I didn't have a list of things to do specifically. I didn't know what that meant, but I just knew.
And I realized at that point that if I didn't change, then it wasn't going to change. I thought that the [00:04:00] circumstances that were happening, the people, that was what was driving the direction of my life. But I realized that's not true. It's me. And so I've been on a journey since then over the last decade of You know, discovering more about myself and figuring out what I want and heading in that direction.
Kellene: Did you not allow yourself to have dreams then because of the trajectory of your life? Is that why you didn't have a list of things to do? 
Debbie: You know, that is an excellent question. I don't know. It's so funny. I literally, I almost feel like I didn't even have time to breathe, to think about what I wanted. I was always so worried about what everybody else wanted, needed.
That was my identity, you know, was being that girl then woman who just does it all and takes care of everyone. And so I don't really think there was [00:05:00] too 
much space to dream.
Kellene: So giving ourselves space to dream, that's an important lesson that we can learn in your memoir on second thought. Maybe I can, you reflect on some pivotal moments.
Can you share one of those aha moments when you realized you were in the driver's seat of your life? And how might that inspire someone stuck in neutral today? 
Debbie: One of the things that while I was on this journey, I. Was re, I don't remember what I was even doing, you know, who remembers you Google something 5, 000 times a day.
So I don't even know what the heck I was looking for. And a quote popped up from Glinda, the good wish from the wizard of Oz. And it said, you have the power, my dear, just had to learn it for yourself. You've always had the power. And it made me realize, yeah, you know what? I do have the power. That quote doesn't just mean, Dorothy, click [00:06:00] your heels three times and say, there's no place like home.
All of us have always had the power to create the life that we want. I just really didn't even know it. I didn't realize that it was my responsibility. I just thought whatever happened. I couldn't do anything to change it. And some things you can't change. You can't change what other people do.
You can't change some events in your life, but you can always change how you react to those events. 
Kellene: So what made you decide I'm going to have an insurance agency? I mean, you didn't just go small time. You went with a state farm. What made you decide to do that? 
Debbie: So I graduated from college with a degree in accounting.
I then became a CPA, worked for a small accounting firm for 10 years and knew that I wanted to change those tax seasons. I mean, for, with the small firms that started in January, it went through the middle, [00:07:00] middle of April, six, seven days a week nights, you know, there was no life. And 
Kellene: that seems to be your theme.
Debbie: Yeah. I mean, it was really. It was really rough. There were things I loved about it. I did it for 10 years. There was other good parts of it, you know, that I did enjoy, but I didn't know exactly what it was that I was looking to do. You know, did I want to go work for a bigger accounting firm at that time?
Computers were just coming into play. Believe it or not, I was one of those people who wrote out trial balances with my paper and pencil and my adding machine that I could have a contest with someone, how fast I am. There was no computers and we were just. Getting them and software was just coming out.
And so I wanted to launch a business to train bookkeepers, how to use the accounting software. And that, you know, so I was thinking I'm going to do that. I was just looking for what is it that interests me. [00:08:00] And I have a very good friend who worked for the company and she had this opportunity that was available.
And it was, I lived in Long Island and this opportunity was in New Jersey, actually Western New Jersey, a part of New Jersey. I was very unfamiliar with, and it was, you know, my husband, I don't even, when we made the decision, we were engaged and he was a salesman. He sold plywood and building supplies and he could just shoot the breeze with anyone about anything.
And I thought. I don't, first of all, I'm going to sit from accounting to sell insurance, talk about boring, like what kind of shift is that? And my friend was such a great salesman. She said, look, Gary can do the selling and you'll run the business because you know, I have business background. Okay. [00:09:00] So we upended our lives and it's a long story, but it was a very, very, Very rough transition for the first two or three years.
Very, very tough working together, not knowing what the heck we were doing. Being in a place that was very different from where we grew up having to meet, quotas and goals that we You know, we just didn't know how to do it. And somehow we, and the money was also a huge problem. So we were under a tremendous amount of stress.
We were living in my girlfriend's basement because we didn't have the money to live somewhere else. And we commuted together. It was like an hour away from where our office was. It was a lot, but in the end. I'll tell you, I, I don't know, looking back, I don't know. I'd like to think I would, but if it weren't for my friend and my husband, I think I might've just turned around with my tail between my legs [00:10:00] and gone back home to Long Island and gotten my job back because I was, it was, I was miserable.
I was miserable, but I couldn't let my friend down. She kind of stuck her neck out for me. And So I did it and I'm very, very grateful that I did. It's now in May, I'll be celebrating my 30 year anniversary. Wow. Yeah. 
Kellene: Wow. That's wonderful. You know, preparedness folks are about resilience and adaptability.
That, that whole lifestyle is full of those two characteristics. How did you develop the resilience to bounce back and to thrive despite your circumstances? And not just with the insurance, but with, you know, infertility, becoming a widow having your life dictated with the caregiving.
Debbie: I, you know, it's a hard question to answer because when you're in the moment, I, and it's tough because I wonder, is it just something you're born with?
And maybe a part of it, I do think it's a [00:11:00] muscle. That you build and boy, when my father had a stroke, well, I guess it probably started, you know, you're a kid and if you're lucky enough to have a lovely childhood, doesn't have any types of traumas when you hit that first trauma, whatever that is.
And for me, I was 12 and my parents were separated and it came out of the blue, you know, I had no idea. And You feel like you can't make it. How are you ever going to survive? And I think with each trauma that you see that you can get through that muscle. It's like you're constantly working that muscle.
I think it's also just not allowing it somehow to kind of conquer you, you know, Of course you're going to be sad. Oh my gosh. You know, there, there are those feelings. [00:12:00] It's not like you say, okay, so, you know, my husband died, but I'm resilient. Great. No, it's not like that. You have to feel all the feelings.
And I think that's important too, because if you stuff it down, which I did with food for a long time, if you stuff it down, then you're not allowing yourself to feel those feelings. And then once you do, it's like that feeling of after you have the best cry, you can take a breath and move on.
Kellene: Yeah. Yeah. I think that's important. That resilience muscle, some people have it in spades. Some people have to really struggle to find that. But those who do, who put up the fight, it's so worth it, isn't it? 
Debbie: Oh gosh, I mean, without it, without being resilient, you know, you are dictating the path of your life because you're crumbling and you're not living [00:13:00] life to the fullest.
It's fullest.
Kellene: So we talk about in preparedness pro, we talk about the 10 principles of preparedness with the first one being spiritual preparedness. How did your moral compass or your spiritual values impact your resilience and adaptability?
Debbie: You know, I don't think that I really tapped into my spirituality until the last decade.
And I have to say, I know spiritual can mean a lot of different things, and this might not even be what you would define it as spiritual. I am more at peace today. And About a week away, a week and a half away from the two year anniversary of my husband passing. And I feel after having more of a practice, a mindfulness practice, really tapping in and giving myself space.
I do feel like my husband's here. I know it sounds strange. I'm not, [00:14:00] sometimes physically feel his presence and I just feel I feel like as long as I continue doing, trying, being curious, that he's there to kind of lead us along, and I know that's not what you meant by spirituality, but it means it just popped into 
my head. Yeah, it does mean different things to different people. And that's beautiful. Yeah I do believe that our loved ones are close to us on the other side of the veil.
We often talk about building a preparedness mindset. What mental tools do you think are essential for someone who wants to overcome life's hurdles and build a stronger foundation for their future? 
For me, it has really been the adoption of a meditation and a journaling practice. And let me tell you, both of those things were something In the past that I would have [00:15:00] said, that's ridiculous.
That's a waste of time. That's too woo woo. You know, I don't have time for that nonsense. I've got things to do. And when I stopped saying, I can't. I can't, I can't meditate. Oh my gosh. The first time I tried, I thought I'd jump out of my skin. I couldn't imagine why anyone would possibly put themselves through such torture.
And when I persisted and kind of experimented with different types of meditation and found something that was more comfortable for me, I now long for it. And the same thing with journaling, I think that those two things, journaling also, you know, opening up a piece of paper that's blank and someone telling me, just write on it without direction, without a question.
And there are journal prompts and whatnot, but for me, it was doing it without the prompts. I thought [00:16:00] I was scared of the blank page, you know, I think I was always worried about being the A student. Like what am I supposed to write? But what I found is once I started writing, I could not believe what I was writing by the end.
It took me on a journey, my mind, that I had no idea that it was in there. And I think tapping into yourself and realizing how much, how strong you are. It again, builds that muscle. It's something that you can then tap into during the difficult times. Something else that I've done is I make, or I made it's in my phone.
So maybe I can list reminding myself of all the things that I thought I couldn't do. I could never get through that. I have. And then I go back to that list and I look at it. And [00:17:00] if I reflect on those moments, I can remember when it happened thinking, Oh my gosh, forget it. How am I ever going to survive this?
But I did. And so when the next thing comes up, I remind myself, Hey, you didn't think you were going to make it through that, but look where you are now. You can do it again. 
Kellene: Yeah. It seems that we have a short memory on when. When we've gotten through rough times and, you know, we've never been left to the wolves, so to speak at least not for long.
Debbie: So you're talking about meditation and you're talking about journaling. I think that we have these sparks within us of leadership and of honor and of goodness, such goodness. And I think that when we take time to meditate and to journal, that it gives us time to find those gems within us.
It gives us time to find them and to nurture them. 
Kellene: You mentioned overcoming [00:18:00] limiting beliefs and even fears, correct? You had fears. Okay. So you're overcoming these limiting beliefs and fears to live your best life. For our audience, fear is often a barrier to starting or sticking with self reliant lifestyle.
I wish it wasn't but it is what practical steps helped you kick fear to the curb? Oh my gosh. 
Debbie: I can't say I've kicked it to the curb. You know, it's still there. It's still there. But I've learned. That the good stuff is on the other side of fear, you know, I think a lot of times I got myself in a situation that I was afraid of and i'm thinking of one situation in particular Where I wanted to I had been extremely involved in my synagogue.
I was the treasurer. I was the vice president and I was next to be president. And I said, I'm not being president because I was scared. I was scared. Would I be able to lead a board [00:19:00] meeting? You know, people were pretty opinionated in those board meetings. And I, I don't know if I had the nerve or the capacity to shut them down without being mean and all of those things, I was worried what happens if some situation comes up and I have no idea what to do.
But the thing I was, I think the most afraid of was that the president had to stand up in front of the congregation twice a year and give a speech. And I was terrified of public speaking because I spent my life trying not to be seen because of my weight because I've had a weight problem since I was an infant and I was constantly being judged.
So who wants to be seen? Cause you know, that leads to being judged. And at the time when this came up, I was really struggling and struggling with it. And I [00:20:00] thought to myself, if I don't do it, I am always going to wonder, could you have done it? You know, I know you think you couldn't do it, but maybe what if, and actually this is one of the reasons I came up with this title, on second thought, what, maybe I can do it.
I got to try because the discomfort of wondering one, you know, not knowing where would that take me? So I agree to do it, but of course I agree to do it six months before I have to give the darn speech. The moment that I had to give that speech, I am telling you, I was sitting in the congregation thinking, okay, I am going to leave.
I'm going to tell the rabbi, I'm going to text the rabbi and tell him. I was ill and I have to go. I mean, I was planning my exit. I was so, so nervous and I [00:21:00] was even reading something. It wasn't like it was off the cuff talking. So I go up there and my hands with the paper, you know, are visibly shaking and I have no saliva and I start talking and they laughed when I, they were supposed to laugh, you know, and it was like, Oh, okay.
That kind of feels good. And then I got to a point in the story or in my speech where I talked something about my dad who had passed away and it was a poignant moment. And when I had practiced it, I never got emotional, but when I was standing there in that moment and I said, whatever it was about my father, the emotion bubbled up and I had to stop, you know, everybody felt it.
And I looked out into the audience and everyone had their eyes on me. They weren't looking at their cell phone, you know, they weren't looking down, they were with me and [00:22:00] some of them also had tears in their eyes. And afterwards, everyone came up to me, you are an amazing speaker. And they shared stories with me based on what I talked about.
And It was an unbelievable experience. I loved it so much and it felt so good to be able to be the one who said something that was impactful to somebody else. And if it weren't for that, I wouldn't be here today. 
Kellene: Yeah. Here you are an international speaker. 
Debbie: Yep. And it was all because I faced my fear because the fear of not trying, of looking back and always wondering was almost worse.
And that pushed me and, you know, I learned a lot about myself. 
Kellene: Well, there was definitely good stuff on the other side of that fear. [00:23:00] And I think it's hard for us to fathom. I call it being a little bit schizophrenic. You know, you have to talk to yourself and say, now look, this is what could happen.
So was there ever a moment that you could share with us where you thought, nope. I'm done. But you surprised yourself by persevering. 
Debbie: Oh gosh, so many moments. I mean, with the insurance agency for sure there was so many moments with you know, when I started. In the online world, I started with a business called the caregiver support squad where I was coaching other caregivers to learn how to prioritize their self care.
And what I found was because that's the secret to surviving. And honestly, that's, The secret to everything is making sure that you put yourself first and it's not selfish, it's [00:24:00] necessary. So that was my message. And when I was working with individual family caregivers, I was also in the middle, still in the middle of caregiving.
And. it was very difficult. That's why they needed someone to help them understand. It's okay to take care of yourselves. But what I found was that they wanted to just share their struggles as a caregiver. And I didn't want to talk about that. And I came to a point where I realized this is like negatively impacting me.
And I had spent time and money. I had done some training, gotten some certifications, paid someone to make a website. I was in financially, I was in and I thought this is it. I can't go on. And I was going to just be done. I tried, I tried and it wasn't for me. And. Then I thought, you know, other [00:25:00] people, you don't see it, you know, I'm talking about business now because this was an entrepreneurial endeavor and you see someone who's successful and you think, gosh, look how easy it is for them.
Look how many, you know, customers, followers, whatever it is, but you don't know what led them there. Right? You'd never know what step they're on. You're on step two, they're on step 20. Of course they're doing better than you are. But they probably had that moment too where they didn't want to go on. And I had to decide, was I going to shift and focus my attention on something else that wasn't so difficult for me?
Or was I just going to pack it in? And I felt like a failure, you know? And, who wants to go on when you feel like that? 
But I did. [00:26:00] 
Kellene: Where do you think that feeling like a failure comes from? Is it because we assume what other people are seeing or thinking about us? 
Debbie: You know, I don't know. I think to myself, I was a very good student and it just came naturally.
You know, I didn't really have to study. I mean, I didn't do as well in college when I wasn't studying, but it just came naturally and it became, and my brother wasn't as good as student. He's four years younger. And since it was always about my weight, Oh, you look good. If I had lost a few pounds or do you really need to eat that?
Here was one area of my life where I felt confident where I shined right? And so I think anything after that where I guess intellectually I fell You know what? I think I felt like [00:27:00] well, what else is there? What else do I have because this is my lane, you know? Nothing else. 
Kellene: Yeah, that's Yeah I think we all get stuck with that.
Especially in terms of limiting beliefs, we think this is our lane and nothing else. When God's given us so many talents, so many to discover and for you, for example, you didn't think public speaking was your lane and yet. Yeah. Here it is. You didn't think being an author was your lane and yet here it is.
Let's talk about let's switch gears a little bit as someone who's been a caregiver and a mom to a son with special needs, correct? Correct. You've probably learned a thing or two about patience and flexibility. What can you share with us? That has, how has caregiving shaped your perspective on preparedness perhaps, especially in a family setting.
Debbie: Early on when I became my father's caregiver, looking back, it actually [00:28:00] started my journey of personal growth because I, as I had said, I didn't want to be seen. I was a person who wouldn't go into a store and ask a question. I wouldn't want to go in and order anything like within my group, my home, my friends, I was very loud and boisterous, but in other situations, I was not.
Because I wanted to hide. When my dad got ill and I became his caregiver, I had to speak up. Because I was the one advocating on his behalf. And so it felt very different. I didn't want to let him down. So it felt very different. So in retrospect, it helped me start to build my confidence, to build my resilience, kind of to step into my power that I didn't even know that I had.
I think, you know what I said [00:29:00] earlier when I was not caring for myself, I was constantly stressed, exhausted, overwhelmed, angry resentful, even though my father didn't mean to have a stroke. My son wasn't, didn't mean to be, you know, born with autism spectrum disorder and now mental illness, but, and my husband and all the things.
But still what I resented, everything, everyone why was it by me? Why was I put in this situation and anything people said, hello. And I could explode because the stress was building up, bubbling up from my toes all the way up to my mouth until like not nice things came out of my mouth because I was not taking the time.
To, I mean, I hate to use cliches, but fill my own cup, you know, the oxygen mask, you've got to put your mask on first before you put your kids [00:30:00] on. And I was never doing that. I was never doing that. And it made me, it's amazed, honestly, that I did not have a heart attack. I had physical manifestations of stress.
You know, an eye twitch that would all of a sudden come, a heart palpitation and when those things happened, that actually would scare me enough to, you know, kind of take a, take a look and see what I needed to incorporate to make those feelings, those, you know, physical things go away. 
Kellene: Well, you probably were feeling like, and even now even with all your progress, you still probably have those days where you're feeling like you're juggling flaming torches.
What advice do you have for someone trying to balance, let's say caregiving or something similar and personal growth and preparedness trying to live more self reliant lifestyle, trying to take more responsibility for themself. What do you have to share with someone like that? 
Debbie: So let me just [00:31:00] tell you the story of how I did write my first book.
My second book just came out too, so I can't believe I'm the author of two books. It blows me away, but anyhow, something I never would have dreamed of, never wanted. And long story, how I got to this point, but I was about to sign up for a course where the woman helped people learn to write, to get their stories out there.
And it, so it was for first time authors and I was scared because I was like, I, all the other people are going to be good writers. I'm not a good writer. Like all the limiting beliefs, all the fear, you know, talking me out of it, talking me out of it. But that same little voice inside was like, well, wait a second.
What if you could do this? And you just never tried. So I was about to take the plunge and we find out that my husband was [00:32:00] diagnosed with terminal blood cancer. And at the time I was seeing a therapist and I said to the therapist, I can't believe I'm even asking you or talking about it at a time like this.
I wanted to take this course, but obviously now with the situation, it's not the time I take it the next time. And she said, no, you take that course now because you're going to need something separate. From everything else that's going on during this time. And of course I was like, well, what if I can't make the meeting because something's going on with Gary or, you know, I don't do the assignment and you know, all the things.
And she said, who cares? And I thought, yeah, I guess, who cares? I and let's face it. I have a good excuse who can say anything. And so I started and the writing process, whatever. It was a very big struggle, just [00:33:00] understanding, figuring out what the heck I was writing. But once I got that done, I.
Almost every day I scheduled it in. If my husband, you know, had was in the hospital, I brought all my stuff with me to the hospital and when he was sleeping or he went down for a test, I wrote, I would wake up at five 30 in the morning. And right before he woke up, I would write in the middle of the afternoon when he didn't need me, I would tell him if he was okay, I'm going upstairs for an hour.
Don't bother me unless it's an emergency. And when he died six months later, I was three, three chapters shy of finishing the book. But the point of my story is there's no excuse. You don't have to write a book, but no matter how your life is spinning out of [00:34:00] control, And I couldn't control his cancer and I couldn't control the other things that were going on with him, but I could control what I was doing.
And it's always so easy to say, Oh, there's no time. If you want to find the time, you can. regardless, if you do have to wake up 15 minutes earlier to, you know, sit and drink your coffee by yourself, do it. So stop making the excuses because I don't think that there's any circumstance where it would prohibit you from doing something positive, something to move you in the direction that you want to go.
Kellene: Oh, that's wonderful. That's wonderful. Yeah. You're running an insurance agency and online store. What do you sell on your online store, by the way? 
Debbie: I also, that came up out of the blue and I just went with it. I have always loved [00:35:00] hearts. You can see one behind me there. I've always loved hearts. And when I was in school in Washington, DC in the eighties, there was a store that sold only items with hearts on it.
And I wanted that store. Hmm. And of course it never happened. And one day I woke up and thought, Hey, I hadn't thought about this in a long time. It's 2022. I can have a heart store online. I don't need to worry about, you know, brick and mortar. And so it is all different heart designs. Wonderful.
Shirts, sweatshirts, totes, phone cases, stuff like that. 
Kellene: So with an insurance agency, an online store, a podcast, and I suspect that's not the end of your resume right now, you're basically a one woman preparedness empire. 
Debbie: I guess so. 
Kellene: What's your secret sauce for staying productive and passionate about your causes?
Debbie: There are dips, [00:36:00] believe me, I am actually in a little bit. I had been in a little bit of a dip and
gets me out of it. Many times are the people I'm surrounded by who encourage me, who remind me how far I've come when I feel like something's not working or I'm spinning my wheels. You know, they remind me and I've actually met so many amazing people just like you online. That, you know, nowadays there's no excuse.
There are no, there's nothing that divides us with all this technology. And I really have to say that I think that the people that I have surrounded myself with are there to to help me. 
Kellene: You know, community is a big part of preparedness. And so having a community of people to surround you and for you to surround is so [00:37:00] important that give and that take how would you suggest to foster meaningful connections when life feels overwhelming?
Debbie: For me, I've always actually found support groups, super helpful. I mean, sometimes you get groups that you don't jive with, right? You know, you don't know it's there, there's a, just a different vibe. But I say that because at least that's a place where you have something in common. People can understand where you're coming from.
You don't have to be embarrassed to say things about certain struggles or thoughts that you have, because. They get it and when you realize that it's not just you going through this I mean, I would say more recently I Was at a very difficult time both my son my older son and my husband suffered from depression and anxiety and it was it is very difficult now with my [00:38:00] son, but he's in a good place right now and If I had told Other people who have never experienced The effects of mental illness on a person, what was happening, they they wouldn't understand they'd be mortified and they would tell me to do things that just don't work with when you're dealing with mental illness.
And so I wound up going to an online group through NAMI national alliance for mental illness. And the group was for family members. of people who suffer from mental illness and to be able, cause it's very, very, very, I keep using the word very, I don't know how to even. Really emphasize just how hard it is on everyone.
And to find a safe place to felt, to feel seen and actually, and then they provided resources and gave me ideas that I hadn't thought of. So I think you [00:39:00] know, it, it doesn't, and it doesn't even have to be like a support group for an issue. It could be a book club. It could be a gardening club.
It could be, you know, wherever you can go to find your common interest with other people. I think is very helpful. 
Kellene: Well, you clearly have a good sense of humor with about life's ups and downs. What's one of the funniest things that happened when you were chasing your dreams? Did you ever have a moment that made you think, well, I didn't see that coming?
Debbie: Oh my 
gosh, that's a hard question. I don't know the answer to that. I'm sure I have, I do have a good sense of humor because I had, I learned early on And my parents really instilled this in me. Anytime anyone would make, you know, a joke, I would be hurt. And they really, it was almost like they made me practice my, my not self deprecation, but being able to laugh at yourself, you know, we all do stupid things.[00:40:00] 
I can tell you, I have actually. It has nothing to do with moving on, but learning to laugh at yourself. I can't believe I'm going to tell you this public story. Okay. But this is what defines me and it's okay with me. It's okay with me now. It was okay with me then. And I think that because of that it helps me.
To laugh it off when I do something dumb because as I said, I was very good at school But I lack a lot of common sense. I mean a lot and I don't cook i've never cooked. I don't like it I don't like food shopping and when I went my husband I knew it was a perfect match because he loved all of those things And I literally Never went to the supermarket, but this is when we were first, I don't know if we were, I don't know if we were married or engaged.
We were living together though. And one Friday I had off and he didn't. And [00:41:00] I thought, okay, this is why I know it's early in the relationship because otherwise I never would have even attempted this. And I said, I'm going to surprise him and I'm going to make him something. And I called my mother, what do I do?
You know? And she said, go get the chicken and da da da. And she said, Tells me the steps. So I go to the supermarket and I'm walking up and down the aisle, up and down the aisle. You know, you don't just buy chicken, but I don't know. I know literally nothing. Do I get these? This says chicken wings. This says thighs.
This is breast. Like I was in there for like 40 minutes and then I look at a package and I'm like, what? What the heck is this? And I left and I ordered Chinese food. And so we're eating the Chinese food and I'm telling him, you know, I was doing this and I said, I had no idea. That people eat rooster and it goes, what are you talking about?
I said, Garrett, [00:42:00] I was in the store. There was, they were selling rooster and I was adamant. I'm like, I'll bet you a million dollars after we're done. We're going to go down to the supermarket, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And as it's happening. All of a sudden I realized, oh, oh no, I bet you it was a roaster.
Kellene: Oh dear, that's funny. That defines me. Well, your podcast is called Maybe I Can. If someone's listening today and thinking, maybe I can, what's the first step they should take to flip that script? 
Debbie: Oh, it is all in your head. It is all in your head. I think Henry Ford said something like, if you think you can, you're right.
And if you think you can't, you're right. And that's why my first book, my memoir is called on second thought. Maybe I can, because I was always that person who said, I can't do that. Everything. It's, it could be the smallest [00:43:00] thing. That's ridiculous. And I would say, I can't do that. And that's fear talking.
And we all have that fear, but think about the things that you thought you couldn't do, and you did do what's the worst thing that could happen. You fail, you learn something about yourself when you fail. I learned that I couldn't have a business for caregivers. It was too much for me. Okay, that's information now moving forward that I can use.
Kellene: Wonderful. Thank you very much for that, Debbie. If people want to find you and your book and your podcast share with us where they go. 
Debbie: Definitely my website. It is Debbie R Weiss. com. You have to put in the R otherwise you'll wind up on a realtor in California. 
Kellene: Okay. And spell Weiss for everyone. 
Debbie: W E I S S like Sam two S's like Sam.
Kellene: Okay. Wonderful. And you [00:44:00] said you've got a book that just came out too.
Debbie: It's called the sprinkle effect, a guide to living a more colorful and fulfilling life. My first book is my memoir. It's just stories that tell an overall story of the trajectory of my life and struggles, and it gives no advice. And so after the first book came out, people said, that's great.
Now, what'd you do? What'd you do to change? What have you done since you turned 50? And so the sprinkle effect is 15 different sprinkles of things that I've sprinkled into my life. small things slowly that have made a difference. And so the sprinkles are things like mindset, belief, resilience, action, dreams, vision, curiosity, joy.
And so Yeah, and it has practical tools to help you yourself work through those sprinkles. 
[00:45:00] Wonderful. Well, thank you for your time, Debbie. We appreciate you and we appreciate you being vulnerable and sharing your path with us and sharing your power with us as well. Wish you all the best and hope that you have a very happy new year.
Oh, thank you so much. The same to you.
Kellene: Thanks for joining us today on Preparedness Pro. I hope you enjoyed yourself and learned something new. Want more preparedness inspiration? Join our live shows every Tuesday and Thursday at 11 a. m. Eastern on YouTube or Facebook at Preparedness Pro, where we can answer your questions live. Looking for a community of like minded people who understand that preparedness is about freedom?
Come join our Facebook group and just search for Preparedness Pro under groups. This is a transcript of [00:46:00] the podcast. See you next time. Transcripts provided by Transcription Outsourcing, LLC. Transcription Outsourcing, LLC. All Rights Reserved. ESO, the European Southern Observatory, is the pre eminent intergovernmental science and technology organisation in astronomy, designing, constructing and operating the